Knowing When You’re Right or WRONG!

I struggle with knowing when I’m right and when I’m wrong.

I am not afraid to have an opinion.   I’m quick to express myself.  I am normally quick to see the ending, what needs to be done, why something isn’t working, what’s missing, and more.  I’m the guy who says; “Hey, there is an elephant on the table.”

The problem is knowing when I’m right versus when I’m wrong.

I’m a passionate guy.  I am convicted when I draw a conclusion.  I believe strongly in my positions and execute and espouse them with conviction and passion.

The problem occurs when I am challenged.

Despite my passion and conviction; I understand, I don’t know everything.  Therefore, I am very open to contrary opinions and ideas.  I embrace dialog and debate.  I thrive on it.  But, many times, I’m not swayed and this is where things get messy.

I struggle at knowing when I’m wrong and need to concede versus knowing when I’m right and need to hold firm.

I easily acquiesce when labeled inflexible.  I don’t want to be perceived inflexible.  I give in or quickly look for compromise, not because I believe I’m wrong, or because I believe there is a better way, but because I don’t want to be considered as stubborn or not collaborative.

Other times, I question my position.  I still “feel” like I’m right, but insecurity sets in and I begin to doubt my position, and I give in.  This happens most when I am debating what to do with someone I consider more experienced or with more knowledge.  The sad part being it’s not always someone with more wisdom.

What kills me is, about 75% of the time, particularly on those things I am MOST passionate, I am right and my acquiescence cost us/me a deal, an opportunity, money, or worse we DIDN’T avoid a failure, incident or loss.

I get PISSED when this happens.   The anger and disappointment inside boils over as I mull about in the thought of how it all could have been avoided if I hadn’t rolled over.

There are times where I was wrong and I didn’t give in.  It too cost us big.  I’m not happy here either.  However, I take ownership, evaluate the situation so it doesn’t happen again and grow from it.

There are also those times, where I was right and stayed the course and where I was wrong and agreed with a different direction.  Those are the good times.

For me, the hard part is knowing when I’m right and when I’m wrong AND when to stay the course at all cost or give in to a better path.

Having the humility to know when your wrong is admiral.  Knowing when you’re right and not budging is critical.   Having the ability to determine which is appropriate, is everything.

How do you know when to hold your ground OR when to give in?

How do you know when you’re right versus when you’re wrong . . . because I’m still trying to figure it out.